Love, but Make It Therapy
Once upon a time, therapy was something couples turned to as a last resort—when things were falling apart. But today? A growing number of Gen Z couples are starting therapy before they even get married.
If the thought of discussing relationship problems before they exist sounds counterintuitive, think again. Premarital therapy is booming, and it’s not just for couples in crisis.
Studies show that couples who go through premarital counseling have a 30% lower chance of divorce than those who don’t. So, why are so many young couples choosing therapy before marriage? Let’s dive in.
The Rise of Premarital Therapy: Why It’s Trending Among Gen Z
Marriage is changing. Unlike previous generations, Gen Z isn’t diving into lifelong commitments blindly. They’re doing the work upfront to ensure they have the emotional tools to handle the rollercoaster of married life.
A 2024 study from the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT) found that 67% of Gen Z couples are open to attending therapy before marriage. That’s a significant shift from past generations, where therapy was often seen as something you only sought when your relationship was in trouble.
So, what’s fueling this shift?
The ‘No More Toxic Love’ Movement
Gen Z has grown up witnessing high divorce rates, toxic relationships, and generational trauma—and they don’t want history to repeat itself. Unlike their parents, who may have toughed it out in unhappy marriages, they’re prioritizing emotional intelligence, communication skills, and conflict resolution before saying “I do.”
The Mental Health Awareness Boom
This is the therapy generation. 77% of Gen Z believe mental health is just as important as physical health (American Psychological Association, 2023). Therapy is no longer stigmatized—it’s seen as a proactive, smart choice, like going to the gym for your relationship.
The Science: Does Premarital Therapy Actually Work?
Short answer: Yes. Research backs it up.
A meta-analysis of 14 studies found that premarital counseling leads to significantly higher relationship satisfaction and a 30% lower risk of divorce (National Marriage Project, University of Virginia).
A 2023 study in the Journal of Couple & Relationship Therapy found that couples who participated in premarital therapy reported greater emotional security and improved problem-solving skills compared to those who didn’t.
Relationship experts at The Gottman Institute emphasize that early intervention in a relationship dramatically reduces the risk of long-term disconnection and dissatisfaction.
What Happens in Premarital Therapy? (And No, It’s Not Just About Arguing)
Many people assume premarital therapy is just about learning how to argue better. While conflict resolution is a part of it, it’s so much more than that. Here’s what couples actually work on:
Communication Styles: Learn how to express needs, listen actively, and avoid toxic communication patterns.
Financial Compatibility: Money is the #1 cause of divorce. Therapy helps couples align on budgeting, financial goals, and spending habits.
Family & Cultural Expectations: Many Gen Z couples are navigating intercultural relationships and differing family dynamics. Therapy helps bridge those gaps.
Sex & Intimacy Expectations: Premarital counseling provides a safe space to discuss intimacy, boundaries, and long-term expectations.
Conflict Resolution: Disagreements are inevitable. Learning healthy ways to handle conflict now can prevent resentment later.
Future Planning: Kids? Career changes? Moving cities? Therapy helps couples align their visions for the future.
Love Smarter, Not Harder
Marriage isn’t just about love—it’s about partnership, communication, and growth. Gen Z is leading the charge in normalizing therapy before marriage, and the data shows it’s a smart move.
So, if you and your partner are planning to tie the knot, why not give your relationship the strongest foundation possible? Love is amazing, but love + emotional intelligence? That’s a recipe for a lifelong connection.
What do you think? Would you try premarital therapy, or do you know someone who has? Let’s talk about it in the comments!
